By Dr KU Brugge, Life Strategist

I couldn’t help notice a higher volume of joggers on the streets, a greater number of people on the treadmill in the Gym and at Weighless sessions early in January. New Year’s resolutions no doubt. However, as in previous years, this number is already tapering off, it being the third week in January, the holidays over and back to work. I thought that this year, I’ll offer some pointers to help to stick to resolutions.

Make the resolution stick

Most people seem to hastily come-up with their (often rather lengthy) list of new year’s resolutions a few minutes before midnight, Old Year’s Eve. Some don’t last the distance of the bell’s 12 tolls before again lighting up the old cigarette. Why is this? The reason is that the resolutions simply don’t stick mentally without some help. How do we make our resolutions stick?

1. Amplify your resolution(s): A resolution, unless amplified will be discarded by the mind just as soon as a competing (and probably more enticing) thought (like a bowl of ice cream) comes to mind. How do we amplify our thoughts? If you think about a new year’s resolution like going out for a regular jog, what comes up? Is it a picture, sound, taste, smell or something you feel (or a combination of these)? What is the quality of what you experience in your mind’s eye (if it is a picture). There are two ways you might view the scene:
a. You see yourself experiencing the running, taking big, resourceful strides, the picture is colourful and crisp
b. You are looking at yourself ‘doing the jogging’ as an observer, its undifferentiated and dull.
It has been found that when we are certain and ready to invest energy and commitment in an activity we are actively in the picture that is crisp and clear. When we are uncertain or less committed, we tend to be on the sidelines.
The more visually stimulating, the better. Just think about ice-cream. Visualise taking out a tub of your favorite vanilla ice-cream from the freezer, feel the coldness under your fingers, the vapors being exuded by it. Open the tub, break the smooth surface and scoop a dollop into a bowl, then pour some warm chocolate sauce over it. See how it melts the ice-cream as it runs down into the bowl, like lava down the side of a volcano. Take a spoon of the delicious mix of cold ice-cream and warm chocolate sauce and let it hit your taste buds, which are now primed with keen anticipation. You can taste it?.

Now, embellish your most desired new year’s resolution (such as getting fit, eating healthier, etc.) in the same fashion, until it is as irresistible as the ice-cream (but better for you). You need to work with the quality of what you perceive through your senses and visualise the resolution until you can no longer tell the difference between it and doing the actual behavior, which now has become effortless. Think of something positive and healthy that you are already doing daily and notice what images, sounds and feelings come to mind. Bring these to bear on your resolutions.

2. Phrase resolutions positively: This means that a resolution which starts with “I want to lose 10kg” immediately places ‘cement booties’ around your brain, dragging down your emotions. However, “I want to be fit, energetic and sleep better” energises, motivates and directs your mind e.g. (weight loss sure is to follow). Whilst you are ‘gaining’ health, you are shedding the kilos.

3. Daily reinforcement: Remind yourself 5 minutes before you get up every morning of the resolution(s) you want to attain. This will keep it top of mind and ‘oil’ the neural connections in your brain which underpin the images of the resolution(s). Make the resolution even more real, by keeping a symbol close at hand to remind you of them, e.g. a miniature trainer on your key-ring if you choose to exercise more. Rehearse your resolution and your outcomes. The more you think the more real it becomes. Make a commitment.

Stick to it

Now that you have made your resolution(s) stick, it is almost effortless to stick to them. Do this in the following manner:

1. Prevail: If you hit obstacles when actively pursuing your resolutions, prevail. There is a Zen saying that, the “obstacle is the path”. Be a gurgling mountain stream that runs over and around the rocks in its way. Lance Armstrong made it clear that if you experience pain or discomfort, work through it as it will soon be replaced by something else. The psychological consequences of quitting however can last a long time. Just think of people wanting to quit smoking. After they quit quitting many times it becomes harder to see this through. Discomfort and pain are markers for change; that you are actually doing something; a road-sign on the journey to the change you want. No pain, no gain (or loss).

2. Set realistic goals and manage your expectations: people who manage to stick to their resolutions set realistic goals and temper their expectations. If you set your goals too high, they may become unattainable; if you set them too low, they won’t motivate you. You also need to manage your expectations to bring them in line with what you are capable off. In so doing, expectations and the reality you ‘deliver’ for yourself by pursuing your resolution, remain in balance, giving you motivation to get it. This also means that the number of resolutions must be realistic. I see people setting completely unrealistic goals, driven by unrealistic expectations. They also tend to do too much at the outset and struggle to sustain the level of energy and motivation required. Always make sure your desired outcomes are “SMARTT” (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Tangible and Time-bound). Time-bound is important, as time-frames need to be attached to various realistic and attainable milestones. Keep a log-book of what you want to attain and when, e.g. weight loss; improved sleeping patterns; more energy; better health, etc.

3. Set challenges that help you discover flow: no one ever said that sticking to New Year’s resolutions has to be sheer agony or utter boredom. In his book “Finding Flow”, Mihalyi Csikszentmihalyi, the ‘father of flow’ states that “flow tends to occur when a person’s skills are fully involved in overcoming a challenge that is just about manageable”. If challenges are too high, frustration followed by worry and then anxiety, ensues; if they are too low relative to one’s skills, boredom and finally apathy, sets in. Therefore, challenges and skills must be in balance and goals crisp. The resultant complete focus, which puts you in the ‘zone’ and makes you feel nearly invincible, will create an experience of sheer exhilaration against the backdrop of an otherwise run-of-mill day. The author clarifies that goals provide one with the opportunity to invest psychic energy in a way which orders one’s life experience. These predictable actions, emotions and choices later become recognizable as a more or less unique “self”.

Dr KU Brugge, as associate of the IE Group, specializes in life-design, emotional intelligence, stress management and resilience building. To contact him, email This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it .